Steps to a relationship

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Read full profile. When you meet someone and fall in love, you probably think that you will ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after. There are10 main stages of a relationship that you may end up experiencing. With that said, let me start by saying there are many different types of relationship stage models out there, but I am going to focus on just one by Dr. Mark Knapp because it is a classic, well-accepted theory.

According to Dr. Knapp, there are ten different stages to a relationship. That being said, there are certain things that happen during these phases. While there are ten different stages, they are divided up into two different phases: the coming together and the coming apart phases. Relationships have to start somewhere, right? Obviously not every relationship starts out the same way. Some couples may meet on a dating app, while others meet through friends or at work. Steps to a relationship of how a couple starts out, there are some distinct stages in the coming together phase.

This stage occurs when you first meet someone. At this point, your focus is mostly on superficial attributes like appearance and how the person presents themselves. During experimentation, you dig deeper into the interests and values of the other. The reason for this is because things are starting to become more serious and intense. You have found out enough about each other that you now want to share more deep and intimate information about yourself with the other person.

Feelings start to develop and there is excitement about being in the relationship. Now that you are officially a couple and have feelings for each other, in the integration stage, you will start to blend your lives together.

You develop routines and habits as a couple. Your family and friends also start to recognize you as a unit. Since you now view yourselves as a unit instead of two individuals, the bonding stage is when real commitment tends to happen. Both of you are very sure of the bond you share, so you will either move in together or get married.

Everyone has Steps to a relationship own way of showing bonding, but regardless, this stage involves some formal commitment in the eyes of society. Whether you are married, living together, or just dating, the coming apart phase happens to most of us at one time or another.

Even in the happiest of relationships, life is not always perfect. But if you have entered the differentiating stage, then you are probably headed toward a breakup. This is the time when you start seeing differences, incompatibilities, and start to see cracks in your unit.

This stage is just a continuation of the differentiating stage. You pull further away from each other, you set boundaries for yourself, communication falters, and you become less and less intimate in all ways — emotionally, mentally, and physically. You start to see yourself as an individual now more than you did before. The unit is unraveling even more. There will be a lot of blaming, defensiveness, and resentment. In this phase, you are no longer going anywhere in the relationship. You are at a standstill. Think about a pond with algae on it.

The coming apart is almost complete. This stage involves avoidance — either physically, mentally, emotionally, or all of the above. One of you may move out of the house, leading to a true separation. In the termination stage, a relationship formally ends. If the couple is married, then the divorce is started or finalized.

If you are just living together, then one or both of your physically moves out and makes the separation final. A lot of the problems happen because people are not very familiar with these different phases of relationships. The more awareness we have, the easier it is to repair a relationship when problems Steps to a relationship to appear.

You can always bounce back into the Coming Together phase. Knowing what stage your relationship is in allows you to be more proactive with fixing the relationship. Featured photo credit: Candice Picard via unsplash. Eugene is Lifehack's Entrepreneurship Expert. He is the co-founder and creative lead of HighSpark, offering presentation training for companies.

As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body — your heartbeat has gone off the charts. Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside. Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:.

The audience will notice you are nervous. If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body.

Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements. Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time: Advertising. Ever felt parched seconds before speaking?

And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out. A sip of water will do the trick. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly. Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure. Do I look funny? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose — contributing something of value to your audience.

Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart. There are two sides constantly battling inside of us — one is filled with strength and Steps to a relationship while the other is doubt and insecurities.

Which one will you feed? What if I forget what to say? All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy — a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about.

One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech. However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content — a definite way to stress themselves out. Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Deing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank. One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch.

It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation. Steps to a relationship fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice.

Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand. Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice — whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker. To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy.

Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member with a hopefully calming face and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others.

But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back. You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up.

You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself. As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech: Advertising. Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:. Relationships Advertising. Carol Morgan Dr.

Share Pin it Tweet Share. Final Thoughts More Tips on Relationships. Knapp and Anita L. More by this author Carol Morgan Dr. Read Next. Communication Advertising. Why Am I so Unhappy? Mark L.

Steps to a relationship

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